That’s What She Said: Mr. Popper’s Penguins
Hello again, all my comedy lovin’ minions. ‘Tis I your connoisseur of comedy and today I bring you, “That’s What She Said,” a segment in which I critique recent movies. On today’s menu we have the not so recent, “Mr. Popper’s Penguins,” a lovely plate of suck with a side of ass. But perhaps I’m being too harsh. Let me tell you what I really think.
Let me start out by saying that I was somewhat excited for this movie. I do after all love Jim Carrey and his last movie, “Yes Man” was surprisingly good. The preview is so damn cute too, I mean Jim Carey dancing with penguins! It looked like one of those movies that both the kid and the adult could enjoy ‘cuz it would have been just enough adult jokes to tide you over and keep you interested so that you actually really enjoyed the movie. You know like the Muppet movies? Well, guess what? IT WASN’T! As a kid you couldn’t stay interested enough in the adult stuff to get to the kid stuff and as an adult you feel as if your intelligence is being insulted on a constant basis. As my niece said, “Aunt Christy, that was a terrible movie” Terrible, from a five year old? In fact she seemed pissed I would even dare subject her to such horseshit.
So as the movie starts you get this heartwarming little story about a kid whose dad was constantly touring the world and who kept in touch with him with a ham radio. Move to present day and that little boy is Jim Carrey and what did he become? A real estate broker in NYC! Gasp! Anyway come to find out his dad disappointed him a lot and surprise, they’re not close and now he’s dead. So he left Popper something, the lawyer doesn’t say what, it arrives at his apartment the next day. He pulls it open, takes out a frozen penguin and we see a note slip under a bureau. Turns out it’s a live penguin and it’s not the only one the rest come later. Yay! You just found out how he get the penguins, you can go home now!
Anyway here’s where it starts to piss me off. After he receives the first penguin he puts in the bathtub and shuts the door. He’s at work all day but he returns home and notices that the whole room is filled with water, he opens the door and gets washed downstairs. Yeah…nuf said, right? Also there’s the ex wife who is just ecstatic about everything. She thinks it’s great that her ex husband has decide to take in a bunch of penguins and sleep with all the windows and doors open with her kids in the apartment in the middle of winter. She loves that he’s shoveling snow into the apartment and creating a winter wonderland for them. This doesn’t sound like any woman I know, except for the one’s who regularly use crack. Oh and remember that letter I mentioned earlier? After giving up, getting rid of the penguins, and ridding the apartment of the winter wonderland, he finds the letter. Funny the ice and snow that was wall to wall in this apartment days earlier didn’t ruin it?